We’ve all been there—stuck in a friend group that just doesn’t feel right. But how can you tell if your friends are really bad for you? Here are nine signs that it’s time to get new friends:
1. They ditch you for better plans.
If your friends are always ditching you for what they perceive to be “better plans,” then chances are they’re not really your friends at all. Real friends would never willingly leave you out in the cold like that.
2. They’re always gossiping.
Gossiping is fun sometimes, but if your friends are constantly talking about other people behind their backs, it’s a sign that they’re not really your friends at all. If they’re gossiping about others, chances are they’re gossiping about you, too. Real friends don’t need to tear others down to make themselves feel better.
3. They only ever talk about themselves.
We all know that one friend who always has to make everything about them. If your friends only ever talk about themselves, then it’s likely that they don’t really care about you or anyone else for that matter.
4. They never listen to you.
Similar to number three — a good friend will listen when you need to talk, even if they don’t have anything to say in response. If your friends tune you out whenever you try to talk to them, it’s a sign that they don’t really care about what’s going on in your life.
5. They’re always trying to one-up you.
Healthy competition is one thing, but if your friends are always trying to one-up you and make themselves look better, it’s not healthy. A good friend will be happy for your successes and will want to see you do well—not feel threatened by your accomplishments.
6. They take without giving anything in return.
Friends should be there for each other, but that doesn’t mean they should be hovering around 24/7 waiting on each other hand and foot. A little give-and-take is essential to any healthy friendship. If your friends only ever take from you without giving anything back, then they’re not really your friends at all.
7. You always have to pay for everything.
Friendships should be 50/50—if you’re always the one footing the bill or doing favors for your friends with no reciprocation, it’s not a healthy friendship. Good friends are generous with their time, their energy, and their resources.
8. They disappear when you need them the most.
We all know that feeling of being let down by a friend when we needed them the most. If your friends have a habit of disappearing when you need them the most, then chances are they’re not really your friends at all.
9. You don’t feel good after spending time with them.
This is perhaps the most important sign of all—if you don’t feel good after spending time with your friends, chances are they’re not really your friends at all. Real friendships leave you feeling energized and happy, not drained and exhausted.
Do any of these signs sound familiar? If so, it might be time to reassess your friendships and cut ties with the people who don’t really have your best interests at heart. Surround yourself with people who make you feel good about yourself and who will be there for you when you need them—those are the kinds of friends worth having in your life!
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