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Out of all the gift-giving holidays, Father’s Day is one of the toughest. No gift, gadget, or doodad ever feels quite right. It either feels overdone, insincere, or just plain unnecessary. Sometimes, sticking with a card is the best option.
Because really, a card can say it all better than any liquor bottle, steak, or pack of fresh socks ever could. Plus, it gives you an excuse to unleash some good ol’ fashioned Dad humor on the man who’s been making you suffer through his jokes for decades.
These hilarious cards from Etsy say it all in 20 words or less. Plus, these shops offer free shipping (and fast, too—looking at you, procrastinators).
Roast your pops and yourself (in a nice way) with this card from Pride and Passion Shop. Because while you might have inherited lots of good qualities from your dad, you also inherited his chainsaw snore. Win some, lose some.
Whether your dad still has his old hatchback from the 1980s or just talks about it like he does, this car-inspired card is sure to be a hit. Hey, maybe that’s why he likes going to so many antique car shows. They have something in common!
While it’s probably impossible to ever fully apologize for the turmoil we put our parents through, this card is a good start. Sure, it might not take away any of those gray hairs you created in your teens. But at least you didn’t tell him everything!
Speaking of teen years—this card wraps it up perfectly. So, maybe he took your door off the hinges or grounded you from the car. At least he didn’t take you out of this world after bringing you into it!
It’s hard to go wrong with a good Star Wars-themed card for sci-fi dads. However, we are not responsible for how many times your dad will do a Darth Vader voice after receiving this card. You also might watch out for impromptu lightsaber battles.
What do you get a no-nonsense, Ron Swanson-esque dad for Father’s Day? A Ron Swanson card, of course. No fluff, no nonsense, just a classic Dad look peering out from behind a strong mustache.
Let’s be honest—your dad probably forgot about Father’s Day coming up, anyway. He likely didn’t expect anything from you in the first place. But at least with this card, you can let him know you were thinking of him (even if he wasn’t).
When you gave your dad lousy drawings as a kid, he was morally obligated as a parent to not laugh at them (even though he probably wanted to). Now, he can belly laugh freely with a purposefully hideous portrait of his favorite furry friend.
So, you got him a card last year. And the year before that. And the year before that. Keep it consistent while also offering up a truth joke with this punny card from Punk Pop Press. Bonus points if your dad always has a cardigan on.
Family doesn’t always have to mean blood. Sometimes, it means the people who put up with us even when it’s really, really hard to do so. Show the paternal figures in your life some love with this hilarious card from Leccese Designs.
Turn your last-minute buy into a joke itself with this tongue-in-cheek card from Eartherella. If he could joke about sending you off to boarding school from ages 12 to 18, then you can get in a nursing home joke or two.
Finally, remind your pops of one of his greatest accomplishments—you! After all, if it weren’t for you, he wouldn’t even be celebrating Father’s Day. Nor would he be receiving these hilarious cards. So really, who should be thanking who here?